Box Office Haiku

“Is there a halftime?”
It’s a play, it’s not football.
There’s no halftime here.

When we say things like
“No refunds or exchanges,”
We are not lying.

“What’s these cheap tickets?
Preview tickets? I want those!”
That was last month, ma’am.

How may I help you?
Somebody hung up on you?
No, that wasn’t me.

If it rains tonight?
Outdoor amphitheater, dude.
Enjoy your shower.

“We spoke on Sunday.”
No, you yelled at me Sunday.
Good luck getting seats.

I can’t see the past
To prove which of us was wrong.
But I can assume…

Yes, the girl at the
concession stand judges you
when you get white zin.

I count old ladies
Who wear purple head to toe.
So far today, five.

Yes, we had lots of
Tickets when you called before.
Shoulda bought them then.