Box Office Haiku

were death threats, cursing,
hurling insults; a part of
my contract? …feeble.

our lady patron
of the tempest and of rage
please, restrain yourself.

the keep and the gate?
protection is not offered
…false imprisonment.

pre-show chat leads to
new theatre discoveries.
can I go home now?

do you have any plays
that my 9 year old can see?
yeah. in wonderland.

you have a credit
yes I heard you say that twice
your sub seats will suck

we are closed tonight.
House Management is cleaning;
oh snap, I meant ME.

peace be with you, friend
as you embark upon this
season of screaming.

the tolling of bells
ask not who the phone rings for
it ringeth for thee.

man with feet on stage
hmm, are you in show business?
get your damn feet off.