Box Office Haiku

Who does accept checks,
For payment, this day and age?
Don’t act so put out.

All new part-timers
Get the difficult patrons
An unspoken rule

While you um and ah

The season will stay sold out.

Um: No magic word.

I know, amazing,

But they went on sale last year.

You’re his biggest fan?

The advertisement

Didn’t suggest you’d get your

Fussy heart’s desire.

It’s not a hate crime

That there’s no discount for you.

Glibness becomes you.

Your bland aggression

And my complete indifference

Can do this all night.

It falls to me to

Offset the stupidity

Of the great unwashed.

“It’s your Zolo Book!
Z! O! L! O! Oh. Wait. That’s
Two Thousand and Ten.”

I’m sorry. Didn’t
Realise I was speaking with
The Queen of Sheba.